OK, I really don’t hate the internet. In fact, I love it a bit too much; it’s becoming the bane of my existence. Especially now that Nugget is the center of my universe I find I can’t tear myself away from reading about what I should and shouldn’t be doing as a new, inexperienced and completely lost parent. I just keep reminding myself that if those teen moms on MTV can do it, then so can I. Plus, with The Man’s love and support I should be able to get through this stage of my life quite well, right? Right?! At least without having to bumble through it too badly.
Except, I feel like a fish out of water and all I can seem to do is research, research, research. I love it because it gives me some perspective, but I hate it because it, uh, gives me some perspective. And, no offense to the good ol’ U.S. of A., but some of what people think are the right things to do with children just, well, go against my grain. Look at the history of the family bed, of which I’m a big proponent and supporter (get those pitchforks out). It was the norm for centuries across all cultures and countries, but American tradition changed drastically only about 150 years ago–um, really, not that long ago–(when people grew wealthier and could afford larger homes) and it was decided that babies should sleep in their own rooms, by themselves, alone. For me, it seemed very unnatural to go from sharing my body with Nugget to casting her away like that. And, seriously, every single mother (yes, every one of them) that I’ve spoken with has shared that they bring, or have brought, baby to bed at some point. And, yet, they share this in hushed tones offering lengthy explanations. Really, I don’t need an explanation because I simply understand. We’re all in the same boat since all of us don’t quite agree with what old research has found (and where much of it has been refuted), and we just don’t feel comfortable leaving our little ones to fend for themselves right away. Plus, we all still have to deal with parents and grandparents who don’t hold one ounce of an opinion back. And who wants to sit there and educate them on the current research? Yet, even as The Man and I now attempt to transition Nugget to her crib I’m feeling a sense of anxiety and, perhaps, dread. I suppose I fear that I’m doing it too early as she’s only just about 12 weeks old, but I’m quite sure she’ll let me know if that’s the case.